April
26
2020
Written by
the LULU—LAND Team
Instagramlove #03

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#instagramlove is a series of posts where we share some of the accounts we enjoy following. We love accounts that leave us feeling inspired, motivated, and curious. Read more about the series and our view on Instagram here.

Don't forget to unfollow accounts
that make you feel like shit! 

#instagramlove @officemagazinenyc // Issue 12 — Spring / Summer 2020

officeoffice was founded as a print magazine in New York City in 2014. Today, it's a global media network designed to subvert convention with an unorthodox approach to fashion and creative culture at large. We have been following office since the very beginning, online as well as offline, they never fail to inspire and always have a quirky and unconventional angle to whatever topic they treat. Check out their website officemagazine.net. Don't forget to click uncensored while you are there, and make a pre-order if you are interested in getting your hand on Issue 12 — Spring / Summer 2020!

https://www.instagram.com/vermland.cph/?hl=en

#instagramlove @vermland.cph

Vermland — is based on a refined yet experimenting approach to product design, interiors, and architecture. By intertwining traditional Danish crafts with an investigative interest in new materials, they create nontraditional design rooted in nature. At Vermland, architects and craftsmen work closely together, enabling them to experiment, draw and produce state of the art solutions directly from their workshop in the heart of Copenhagen. They have a way of merging Scandinavian aesthetics with a contemporary elegance that ensures relevance and timelessness at the same time. Check it out – it's simply stunning!

#instagramlove @tableau_cph

TABLEAU welcomes you into a rather unique space in the heart of Copenhagen – a colorful universe of contemporary art, design, and flowers. The studio creates new and innovative objects and vases to showcase flowers and plants in an unpredictable manner. The space functions as a gallery that hosts exhibitions curated by different artists who share the same vision. It's a celebration of craftsmanship and a mix between raw materials and the softness of flowers. Also, check out their beautifully designed website, tableau-cph.com, and visit the webshop while you are at it.

미식 美識 Meeseek — A remarkable merge between a gallery and a Korean tea house. We love the aesthetics and hope we'll have the chance to visit this tiny gem in Seoul in the future – until then, we'll continue following them in cyberspace. We miraculously found our way to Meeseek, recently, when they did an exhibition streaming with one of our friends, Peter Amby, the owner of Last Resort Gallery in Copenhagen.

#instagramlove @masseykleingallery

Massey Klein Gallery — is a contemporary art gallery located in the Lower East Side of NYC. The gallery supports both local and international mid-career and emerging artists. Husband and wife team, Garrett Klein and Ryan Massey, believe in the collaborative partnership between artist, gallery, and collector. The gallery functions as a meeting place where collectors and the general public can experience carefully curated exhibitions and foster meaningful relationships with art. We'll definitely drop by the next time we are around. Check out exhibitions at masseyklein.com.

April
19
2020
Written by
the LULU—LAND Team
Brené Brown: The Power of Vulnerability
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This video has made it into the list of our favorite TED talks, and it seems like we are not the only ones who think that this lady rocks. The Power of Vulnerability is one of the top five most viewed TED talks in the world, with over 47 million views.

Brené Brown is a research professor (/storyteller) at the University of Houston. She has spent the past two decades studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy, and is now using that work to explore a concept that she calls Wholeheartedness.

"Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging."

BRENÈ BROWN : THE CALL TO COURAGE

If you find this TED talk as interesting as we did, you should also check out Brené Brown: The Call to Courage on Netflix as well.

It's a 2019 documentary film directed by Sandra Restrepo. The documentary depicts Brené Brown as she discusses what it takes to choose courage over comfort in today's culture.

BOOKS

If you still haven't had enough, she is also the author of five number one New York Times bestsellers:

Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts (2018)

Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone (2017)

Rising Strong: The Reckoning, The Rumble, The Revolution (2015)

Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead (2012)

The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are (2010)

WE LOVE TO CONNECT PEOPLE

NAME Brené Brown

WEBSITE brenebrown.com

INSATGRAM @brenebrown

FACEBOOK @brenebrown

TWITTER @BreneBrown

LINKEDIN Brené Brown

CREDITS

VIDEO ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED BY
TED – Ideas worth spreading

March
23
2020
Written by
the LULU—LAND Team
Instagramlove #02

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#instagramlove is a series of posts where we share some of the accounts we enjoy following. We love accounts that leave us feeling inspired, motivated, and curious. Read more about the series and our view on Instagram here.

Don't forget to unfollow accounts
that make you feel like shit! 

#instagramlove @jeromevintage & @rosyvintage_cph

Jérôme Vintage is a Copenhagen based vintage boutique specialized in selecting and selling fine vintage clothing. We love how they make vintage garments look stylish as f***.

Also, check out the little sis Rosy Vintage

"The rebellious and non conformist new girl on the block with immaculate taste and chic sense of style who has taken on the daunting task of changing the way we consume and think about fashion. Her mission is clear; to democratize vintage fashion and make it accessible for everyone regardless of gender, income, or origin without compromising neither the aesthetic appeal nor the exclusive shopping experience.

Rosy, was basically conceived from the wish and need to make consumers more aware of the negative consequences and environmental impact of the fashion industry. It is imperative that we move away from the current paradigm sooner rather than later and make a collective effort to see that vintage and resale, in general, become the norm rather than the exception. This is only possible when vintage fashion becomes more inclusive, more affordable, and more easily attainable."

Rumor has it that they are working on creating an online shop as well, you can sign up to their newsletter here.

Jérôme Vintage: Gl. Kongevej 105, 1850 Frederiksberg, Denmark // Rosy Vintage: Kronprinsensgade 9, 1114 Copenhagen K; Denmark

#instagramlove @rupikaur

Rupi Kaur (rupikaur.com) is an Indian-born Canadian poet, illustrator, and author. She started drawing at the age of five when her mother handed her a paintbrush and said—draw your heart out. We love her minimalistic, playful and feministic, yet bold visual poetry.

#instagramlove @jonathanfaust

Jonathan Faust (jonathanfaust.com) is a Copenhagen based designer specialized in typography and conceptual packaging with a primary focus on the consumer category and concept development. We have known Jonathan and been following his work for the past 10 years. His hand-lettering keeps astonishing us. He combines good craftsmanship and graphic design like no one else. Yes, he is left-handed and a typography genius. Jonathan currently works at the Danish strategic design agency, Everland.

#instagramlove @lesparisiennesdumonde

Les Parisiennes du Monde is a dreamy universe of inspirational photos found and reposted from around the worldwide web combined with captivating captions. Careful, you might get an overdose of love. 578t followers, just saying.

#instagramlove @heidarlogi // Photo by @nattesfred

Heiðar Logi is an athlete and cold water surfer from Iceland. His photos are incredible and we find his story very relatable. We first heard about him in a podcast he did with Joel Runyon  a while back (Listen to the podcast here) and later in the video above he did with North66. When he isn't chasing the next wave in Iceland, he travels, have a knack for yoga and wood craft.

March
22
2020
Written by
the LULU—LAND Team
Derek Sivers: The Meaning of Life
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VIDEO REPOSTED WITH PERMISSION FROM DEREK SIVERS

What is the meaning of life?

Ouch, that's a complex one. This explanation by Derek Sivers somehow resonates with us, and we hope you'll find it as interesting and inspiring as we do!

"Watch," or actually just listen, and let us know what you think.

TRANSCRIPT

There’s a true story about the student who showed up late to math class. He copied the problem that was already written on the board, assuming it was homework, and solved it that week. Only afterwards did he find out the teacher put it on the board as an example of an unsolvable problem.

This question — “What is the meaning of life?” — is the classic unsolvable problem. For thousands of years, people have been trying to figure it out. It’s the punchline cliché of unanswerable questions.

But right now, let’s be the naive ones that don’t know it’s considered unsolvable, and just figure out the meaning of life in under 20 minutes. OK?

LIFE IS __________

What word do you think goes in that blank? Life is what? Any ideas?

Let’s look at some of the different options that philosophers and smarties have said.

LIFE IS TIME

Some say life is time. Life is all about time. The definition of life is the time between when you’re born and when you die. So the literal meaning of life is time.

So if life is time, the way to have a good life is to use time wisely.

How can you use time wisely? Five ways.

1. Remember it’s limited

If you find out tonight that you’ve only got one year left to live, you’ll make the most of this next year. If you act like life is infinite, you won’t.

To achieve great things, two things are needed: a plan, and not quite enough time.

Give yourself tight deadlines. Remember you could die at any time. Don’t delay.

How can you use time wisely?

2. Be mostly future-focused

Make most of your current actions serve your future self. Learn, practice, exercise, delay gratification, save and invest your money, and build towards your ideal future. People who do this are more successful and even happier.

But too much future focus leads to being a successful person on your 4th marriage, with no true friends. Too much future focus can take time away from important things that need you to be in the moment.

How can you use time wisely?

3. Be somewhat present-focused

Sometimes, pull your head out of the future, and give your full attention to the present. Relationships, communication, and sex require this.

But too much present focus is hedonism: living only for immediate gratification with as much excitement and novelty as possible.

Too much present focus leads to an empty bank account and no impulse control.

Too much present focus robs you of the deeper happiness of delayed gratification, achieving long-term goals, and developing valuable expertise.

How can you use time wisely?

4. Be somewhat past-focused

To remember your past is to live twice.

Keep your life in the context of the past, to see how far you’ve come.

Put aside time to re-interpret your past events, as a powerful reminder that you can re-interpret your present and future, too.

How can you use time wisely?

5. Get in the zone

You know the feeling of flow — where you’re focused on work that’s not too easy and not too hard — where the work itself has clear goals and is its own reward.

People at the end of their life who claimed to be the happiest with their life were the ones who had spent the most time in this state of flow.

For a good life, pursue the work that puts you in this state, and avoid the things that pull you from this state.

Let’s say life is time. What do you think? Pretty good argument?

Let’s look at another perspective.

LIFE IS CHOICE

Some say life is choice. Life is all about choice. You make a hundred little choices a day, and a hundred big choices in your life. These choices change your entire life. Your life is created by your choices. Therefore life IS choice.

So if life is choice, the way to have a good life is to make good choices.

How can you make good choices? Four ways.

1. Let instinct trump logic

The different parts of your brain started developing at different periods in evolution. The oldest part of your brain, the one that’s been evolving since we were fish, deals with instincts, fears, and gut feelings. The newest part of your brain, the one that’s pretty uniquely human, deals with logic, language, and predictions.

This newest part is still in beta. A $5 calculator can beat it at math. But this oldest part was launched a billion years ago, and has been in production and development ever since.

Everything you observe and learn is first processed by your logical brain, but then the results are permanently stored as instincts, fears, and gut feelings. Your instincts and emotions hold the culmination of everything you’ve ever observed and learned. So you’ll make better choices if you listen your instincts, instead of relying too much on your $5 calculator beta brain.

How can you make good choices?

2. Stop at good enough

You now have more options than ever. You try to choose the best option, the best career, the best school, and the best boyfriend/girlfriend/partner/spouse.

But thinking this way makes you feel worse about the choices you’ve made. You’re more aware than ever of all the options you didn’t choose, and the benefits of each.

So don’t seek the absolute best. Stop when you find an option that is good enough. You’ll make an equally good choice, but more importantly, you’ll feel much better about it. Happiness counts.

How can you make good choices?

3. Set limits

Every choice you have to make causes a little bit of pain. Having choice in life is good, but having more choice is not always better.

You’re happier when you let other people make some choices for you. If you’re very sick, you want your doctor to choose what’s best, not say, "There are dozens of good options. What do you want to do?" This is the appeal of religion. It gives you rules. It makes many of the choices for you.

So set limits to your choices in life. Cut off some options. Give yourself rules.

How can you make good choices?

4. Choose important not urgent

You know the difference between what’s long-term important versus short-term urgent.

What’s urgent are emails, texts, tweets, calls, and news.

What’s important is spending a thousand hours to learn a new skill that will really help you in your life or work. What’s important is giving your full undistracted attention to the important people in your life. What’s important is taking time to get exercise, or to collect and share what you’ve learned.

But none of these things will ever be urgent.

So you have to ignore the tempting cries of the urgent, and deliberately choose what you know is important.

So life is choice? What do you think? Pretty good argument? Let’s try another.

LIFE IS MEMORY

Some say life is memory. The future doesn’t exist. It’s something we imagine. The present is gone in a millisecond, so everything we experience in life is a memory. You could live a long life, but without a lot of memories, you only experienced a short life. If you don’t remember your life, it’s like it never happened. So life is memory.

So if life is memory, the way to have a good life is to make more memories.

How can you make memories?

Change routines. Break monotony. Move. Make a major change whenever you can. These are your chronological landmarks. These are the hooks where you’ll hang your memories.

Document it. Blog it. Not in a company’s walled garden, but in a format you can archive and look through in 50 years, or your grandkids can look through in 100 years. Keep a private blog for your future self, and tell the tales of where you’ve been, what you did, and the quirky people you’ve met along the way. You’ll be surprised how much you forget if you don’t record it.

Socrates said the unexamined life is not worth living. What about the forgotten life?

So life is memory? What do you think? Want to do another?

LIFE IS LEARNING

Both my smart friends and my spiritual friends insist that the meaning of life is learning — that the reason you’re here is to learn. Not just for your own sake, but for everyone alive, and future generations, the meaning of your life is to learn.

So if life is learning, the way to have a good life is to learn a lot.

How can you learn a lot?

Instead of talking about learning techniques, let’s talk about getting the right mindset, so you can learn more than you realize.

You’ve probably heard about the Fixed mindset and the Growth mindset.

The Fixed mindset says, "I am good at this" or "I am bad at this". This starts in childhood when your parents say, "You’re so good at math!" You think, "I’m good at math!" But then when you do poorly on one test, you think, "They were wrong. I’m not good at math.” Most people think this way. You can hear it when they say, “She’s a great singer” or “I’m just no good at dancing.”

The Growth mindset says, "Anyone can be good at anything. Skill comes only from practice."

Two impossibly hard tests were given to hundreds of children. After the first test, all of the students were praised, but half of the students were privately told these 6 words: "You must be good at this." The other half were privately told these 6 words: "You must have worked really hard."

When they were given the second test, the students who were told, "You must be good at this", did 20% worse on the 2nd test. Those 6 words encouraged a fixed mindset that made them feel there was no point in trying. You either are or you aren’t.

The students who were told "You must have worked really hard", did 30% better on the 2nd test. Those 6 words encouraged a growth mindset that made them feel that working harder made all the difference.

So that’s a +-50% difference in performance because of 6 quick words by one teacher.

Multiply that by all the people in your life, all the days you hear feedback, and all the things you tell yourself, and you can see how this simple difference in mindset can make or break a life of learning.

Parents, pay attention to this. You may be harming your kids when you tell them they’re good at things.

Successful people, pay attention to this. You may be harming yourself if you believe the praise that people give you. People tell you you’re great at what you do, never just that you must have worked hard.

So... life is learning? What do you think?

SOMETHING ELSE?

Should we look at the Buddhist idea that life is

SUFFERING?

Nah, that’s no fun.

Life is

LOVE?

Too ambiguous.

Life is

NOTHING BUT REPLICATING DNA?

Too accurate.

Let’s change the subject.

CHINESE

A few years ago, I started learning Chinese. I’m fascinated with the writing. I’m trying to memorize how to write these characters.

Chinese characters look complicated, but they’re mostly made up of smaller simpler characters, the way that English words are made up of Latin roots and such. So you can remember the meaning of each character by knowing the meaning of its ingredients. For example:

语 language = words 讠+ five 五+ mouth 口

So... Language is words that at least five mouths speak? Brilliant!

谢 thank you = words 讠+ body 身+ inch 寸

Hmmm... This one is not so obvious. Maybe the idea is that when you say thanks, you speak words that give a body an inch of respectful space? That’s interesting.

名 name = evening 夕 + mouth 口

So your real name is what’s spoken by a mouth in the evening? That’s kind of romantic.

I get so curious about the historical or cultural meaning behind each one.

Let’s change the subject.

TALKING HEADS

Talking Heads were a great band from the late-70s to mid-80s. Their lyrics were really evocative and mysterious. They made you wonder what they were really about.

Then I read an interview with the Talking Heads where they said that many of their lyrics were just random. They would write evocative phrases onto little pieces of paper, then throw them into a bowl, and shuffle them up. Then they’d pull them out, and put them into the song in that order. They did this because they liked how the listener creates meaning that wasn’t intended.

We assume that if someone writes a song, then sings it on stage into a microphone, that it must have meaning to them.

But nope. It was just random. Any meaning you think it contains was put there by you, the listener, not the writer. Like a Rorschach test.

BACK TO CHINESE

I got so curious about the historical meaning of these Chinese characters that I got a Chinese etymological dictionary that tells the full history behind every one.

I looked up the examples I gave here, and found out those characters were just phonetic! Those composite character bits were NOT chosen for their meaning at all, just their sound!

So it seems I’ve just been putting the meanings into them, myself. They actually had no meaning at all!

It blew my mind. I had been memorizing hundreds of characters for months, reading all kinds of meaning into the ingredients of each one.

After recovering from that, I thought: How many other things in life really have no meaning? What else have I been putting my own meaning into, thinking it was true?

WIRED

I know that we’re wired to do it. I know we survived on the savannah for eons because we evolved to look for patterns. Our ancestors are the ones who noticed the patterns of the tiger stripes or the lion face in the grass.

A moth is so deeply wired to fly towards the light that it may never accept that your light bulb is not the moon.

We are so deeply wired to find patterns that we may never accept that many things are just random.

We should have the same sympathy for our faulty wiring as we do for the moth. Evolution taught us to do this thing, but didn’t teach us to stop.

Give us some dots and a line, and we’ll see a face. Burn some toast and we’ll find Elvis in it.

A carrot from my garden looks like Jesus. What does it mean?

A black cat crossed my path as I walked under a ladder on Friday the 13th. What does it mean?

An old friend calls just a minute after I was thinking about them. What does it mean?

What does it mean that you went to a prestigious well-known school? What does it mean that you didn’t?

What does it mean that your good friend died? What does it mean that you’re tall?

What does it mean that you have a lot of followers online? What does it mean that you don’t?

What does it mean that you’re female? What does it mean that you’re male?

What does it mean that you’re an entrepreneur? What does it mean that you’re not?

What does it mean that all of your previous attempts at something have failed?

Nothing! Nothing at all.

Nothing has inherent meaning. Everything is only what it is and that’s it.

So let’s get back to our original question and wrap this up.

LIFE IS _____

What is the meaning of life?

LIFE IS ______

TIME?

CHOICE?

MEMORY?

LEARNING?

SUFFERING?

LOVE?

REPLICATING DNA?

You can tell by the variety of answers that they are just projected meanings.

You can choose to project one of these meanings onto your life, if it makes you feel good, or improves your current actions.

But you know the real answer is clear and obvious now.

Life is (just) life. It doesn’t mean anything.

Erase any meaning you put into past events. Erase any meaning that’s holding you back. Erase those times where people said that this means that. None of it is real.

Life has no inherent meaning. Nothing has inherent meaning.

Life is a blank slate.

You’re free to project any meaning that serves you.

You’re free to do with it, anything you want.

Thank you.

ABOUT DEREK SIVERS

Derek Sivers is a notable American writer, musician, programmer, and entrepreneur best known for being the founder and former president of CD Baby, an online CD store for independent musicians. He started CD Baby somewhat by accident in 1997 when he was selling his own CD on his website, and friends asked if he could sell theirs, too. CD Baby went on to become the largest seller of independent music on the web, with over $100M in sales for over 150,000 musician clients.

In 2008, Derek sold CD Baby to focus on his new ventures. His current projects and writings are all at sivers.org.

You can read more about Derek in his own words here.


WE LOVE TO CONNECT PEOPLE

NAME Derek Sivers

EMAIL derek@sivers.org

WEBSITE sivers.org

YOUTUBE Derek Sivers

TWITTER Derek Sivers

February
28
2020
Written by
the LULU—LAND Team
"Be A Lady They Said"
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THIS IS POWERFUL. THIS IS TIMELY. THIS IS IMPORTANT.
At LULU—LAND, we like to support people who dare. We find this message about the contradictory injunctions women faces in 2020 from Girl Girls Girls MagazineCamille Rainville & Cynthia Nixon incredibly powerful, timely, and important, in an age where we are redefining what it means to be female.
The short now-viral video unfolds the various meanings of the term “be a lady,” outlines the confusing nature of what it means to be a “real woman” and highlights the immense pressure and impossible standards women face in society today. We hope that this will help create a constructive and positive debate. Well done!

TRANSCRIPT

Be a lady they said. Your skirt is too short. Your shirt is too low. Your pants are too tight. Don’t show so much skin. Don’t show your thighs. Don’t show your breasts. Don’t show your midriff. Don’t show your cleavage. Don’t show your underwear. Don’t show your shoulders. Cover up. Leave something to the imagination. Dress modestly. Don’t be a temptress. Men can’t control themselves. Men have needs. You look frumpy. Loosen up. Show some skin. Look sexy. Look hot. Don’t be so provocative. You’re asking for it. Wear black. Wear heels. You’re too dressed up. You’re too dressed down. Don’t wear those sweatpants; you look like you’ve let yourself go.

Be a lady they said. Don’t be too fat. Don’t be too thin. Don’t be too large. Don’t be too small. Eat up. Slim down. Stop eating so much. Don’t eat too fast. Order a salad. Don’t eat carbs. Skip dessert. You need to lose weight. Fit into that dress. Go on a diet. Watch what you eat. Eat celery. Chew gum. Drink lots of water. You have to fit into those jeans. God, you look like a skeleton. Why don’t you just eat? You look emaciated. You look sick. Eat a burger. Men like women with some meat on their bones. Be small. Be light. Be little. Be petite. Be feminine. Be a size zero. Be a double zero. Be nothing. Be less than nothing.

Be a lady they said. Remove your body hair. Shave your legs. Shave your armpits. Shave your bikini line. Wax your face. Wax your arms. Wax your eyebrows. Get rid of your mustache. Bleach this. Bleach that. Lighten your skin. Tan your skin. Eradicate your scars. Cover your stretch marks. Tighten your abs. Plump your lips. Botox your wrinkles. Lift your face. Tuck your tummy. Thin your thighs. Tone your calves. Perk up your boobs. Look natural. Be yourself. Be genuine. Be confident. You’re trying too hard. You look overdone. Men don’t like girls who try too hard.

Be a lady they said. Wear makeup. Prime your face. Conceal your blemishes. Contour your nose. Highlight your cheekbones. Line your lids. Fill in your brows. Lengthen your lashes. Colour your lips. Powder, blush, bronze, highlight. Your hair is too short. Your hair is too long. Your ends are split. Highlight your hair. Your roots are showing. Dye your hair. Not blue, that looks unnatural. You’re going grey. You look so old. Look young. Look youthful. Look ageless. Don’t get old. Women don’t get old. Old is ugly. Men don’t like ugly.

Be a lady they said. Save yourself. Be pure. Be virginal. Don’t talk about sex. Don’t flirt. Don’t be a skank. Don’t be a whore. Don’t sleep around. Don’t lose your dignity. Don’t have sex with too many men. Don’t give yourself away. Men don’t like sluts. Don’t be a prude. Don’t be so uptight. Have a little fun. Smile more. Pleasure men. Be experienced. Be sexual. Be innocent. Be dirty. Be virginal. Be sexy. Be the cool girl. Don’t be like the other girls.

Be a lady they said. Don’t talk too loud. Don’t talk too much. Don’t take up space. Don’t sit like that. Don’t stand like that. Don’t be intimidating. Why are you so miserable? Don’t be a bitch. Don’t be so bossy. Don’t be assertive. Don’t overact. Don’t be so emotional. Don’t cry. Don’t yell. Don’t swear. Be passive. Be obedient. Endure the pain. Be pleasing. Don’t complain. Let him down easy. Boost his ego. Make him fall for you. Men want what they can’t have. Don’t give yourself away. Make him work for it. Men love the chase. Fold his clothes. Cook his dinner. Keep him happy. That’s a woman’s job. You’ll make a good wife someday. Take his last name. You hyphenated your name? Crazy feminist. Give him children. You don’t want children? You will someday. You’ll change your mind.

Be a lady they said. Don’t get raped. Protect yourself. Don’t drink too much. Don’t walk alone. Don’t go out too late. Don’t dress like that. Don’t show too much. Don’t get drunk. Don’t leave your drink. Have a buddy. Walk where it is well lit. Stay in the safe neighborhoods. Tell someone where you’re going. Bring pepper spray. Buy a rape whistle. Hold your keys like a weapon. Take a self-defense course. Check your trunk. Lock your doors. Don’t go out alone. Don’t make eye contact. Don’t bat your eyelashes. Don’t look easy. Don’t attract attention. Don’t work late. Don’t crack dirty jokes. Don’t smile at strangers. Don’t go out at night. Don’t trust anyone. Don’t say yes. Don’t say no.

Just “be a lady” they said.

CREDITS

"Be a Lady They Said"

PUBLISHED Girls. Girls. Girls. Magazine

WORDS Camille Rainville

NARRATOR Cynthia Nixon

DIRECTOR Paul McLean

FASHION DIRECTOR Alicia Lombardini

MAKEUP STYLIST Campbell

HAIR STYLIST Riad Azar

MUSIC Louis Souyave

PPST Mini Content

PRODUCER Claire Rothstein

December
23
2019
Written by
the LULU—LAND Team
Instagramlove #01
Read more

Instagram – a love and hate relationship. On the one hand, it is a fantastic source of inspiration. It enables us to explore and discover people, brands, and concepts we wouldn't necessarily find elsewhere. It allows us to share whatever we find inspiring, attract an audience, create a community, and share bits and pieces of our lives with others.

On the other hand, it can be extremely time-consuming, addicting and have some rather unfortunate side effects such as; leaving people feeling insufficient, pressured to live a "picture perfect"  life, not to mention the adverse effects on mental health.

And then there is the monitoring, the algorithms, and the non-linear timeline, which freaks us out when thinking too much about it. In general, we dislike the fact that social media platforms try to control our feed, figure out how we feel, what we would like to see, decide what we should be reading, have a say in what we are exposed to and when – It's SCARY. We would opt out of all the above and choose to have the chronological, non-monitored, non-filtered timeline back any day.

Nevertheless, we choose to focus on the positive aspects. For us, the key is — like with most other things in life — BALANCE. It goes without saying that it is inappropriate for us to spend a ridiculous amount of time with our heads buried in our phones. Looking at shit that makes us feel bad, spending way too much energy overthinking what we share and when to post. However, we believe that Instagram is fantastic when used in a healthy way.

In our experience, creating a healthy relationship with the platform is all about who we follow and how they make us feel. Just like in real life, we don't have to agree on everything, but we need to treat each other with kindness and respect. Naturally, we are closer to some people, attracted by certain concepts, brands, and types of businesses in periods of our lives for whatever reason, and that's okay.

Our simple advice is to take active control of your social media platforms and the time you spend on them. Make conscious decisions about who you follow. You don't have to follow anyone just because they follow you. You are free to follow, unfollow, mute, block, delete, and report whomever you want to at any giving time, if for some reason, whatever they post doesn't do anything good for you. Stay true to yourself, your feed is a representation of who you are and what you believe in. Do what fits you. Be responsible and mindful. The moment you have a following of even one real person, you have a responsibility. What you share may influence your audience. Make sure that whatever you do, makes you happy. Don't be a jerk and don't take it too seriously. Have fun! And finally ...

Don't forget to unfollow accounts
that make you feel like shit! 

We love to follow accounts that leave us feeling inspired, motivated, and curious. #instagramlove is a series of posts where we share some of the accounts we enjoy following.

#Instagramlove @tci_theclassyissue


The Classy Issue (theclassyissue.com) is a blog curated by Niclas von Schedvin. You've probably seen the branded logo shirts somewhere in cyberspace or on the streets. Eye-catching! When almost 500.000 people follow you for your taste in images – it's fair to say you must be on to something.

#instagramlove @joelrunyon


Joel Runyon is an American athlete and entrepreneur. He is the founder of IMPOSSIBLE – a company dedicated to helping people push their limits and do the impossible. In 2017 Joel became the youngest in the World to join the 7 Continents Ultra Club, having run an ultra on all 7 continents (yes, including Antarctica). Along the way, he raised money to built 7 schools for charity. Pretty badass!

#instagramlove @romandarkholme


We met Roman Darkholme in a dive bar in Lower East Side, NY, last year. We were immediately drawn to his personality and way of just being himself 100%. We absolutely love his videos and Instagram stories! He is ridiculously funny, loves beautiful men, and never seems to have a bad hair day. He is a talented filmmaker, a musician, and a gay with a phone (His words, not ours).

#instagramlove @the_yoni_empire


You should follow @the_yoni_empire if you are into conversations about sexuality and pleasure, combined with beautiful aesthetics. Elena Rossi teaches people to make love, works as an orgasm coach, and is the creator and product designer behind @onna_lifestyle. Yes, it’s toys for grown-ups.

#instagramlove @davidshrigley


David Shrigley is a British visual artist who's art can brighten up the darkest day. It's unpretentious and funny, and he is not afraid of portraying the SHIT we all think about from time to time!


© 2020 LULU—LAND ApS
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